Are you waiting?

We spend a lot of time waiting for something. Right now, I am waiting for pizza to be delivered. Earlier today, I was waiting for my work day to be over. I'm not a very patient person. I don't like to wait. The last few weeks, I have really turned my focus inward, I've really been examining just what makes me tick. I realized that I look too much toward what will be, and tell myself I'm waiting for this or that... I am not very good at enjoying the moment. I have a picture, a vision if you will, of what my life should be - what it WILL be, if I wait long enough. The problem with this is, if all you do is WAIT for something - nothing happens. You'll always be waiting. Waiting for your ship to come in, waiting for the phone to ring, waiting for your kids to grow up, waiting, waiting, waiting... Now, I'm not necessarily waiting for all these things - but everyone waits for something. Like I said - I'm waiting for pizza right now. I'm hungry, and impatient. BUT, here it is - mmmm. Sometimes things are better when you have to wait for them.

I'm also waiting for Paul to come home. For him to be better.  Thats not really fair to him. To expect that he will be better than he is. He is already the man I love, and have loved for more than 1/2 my lifetime. I shouldn't expect better. I should expect healed (improved maybe?). I think, he is probably waiting to come home too. And wondering if he will be healed enough to come home. Again, we WAIT to find this out.

Throughout all this waiting, we are being taught life's lessons.To have patience. To embrace God's mercy. To humbly come before Him and ask for His help and guidance. (Yes, I was a Calvinette, NOT a GEM...!) And, sometimes you have to wait to hear the answers to prayers.  I struggle with these things. I'm not patient. And I'm certainly not humble! And to give everything to God - to turn it over and quit worrying... well, I'm learning that lesson daily :) Its a good thing God is patient with us, and that His mercy is unfailing!

I'm also finding that you don't have to wait alone. God puts people in our lives for a reason. Some people are there only for a season, but others - they are there for the long haul. Through the cold, lonely winters that life inevitably sends our way, the springtimes - with the renewal of spirits. The summers of life - when its easy to BE a friend, and the autumns when harvest is over, and life is looking like its winding down. He puts people in our lives when we NEED them. Our friends are God's hands in our lives - sent by Him to help us wait. 

I'm also finding that we don't have to just WAIT. We can do something to pass that time. Sometimes, the things we find to do - become a lifestyle change. I'm hoping that getting MOVING is going to be a good change in my life. I'm hoping that writing all the stuff in my head is going to be a life-long change.  But, even if these things are only "seasonal", I'm glad I started them. I have started a devotional at night too. Right now, I am working on Psalm 23. I think God is making me lie down in the green pastures to restore my soul. Sometimes, the waiting is good for us. It makes us take the time out of our busy, crazy lives to just be.

Sorry for the rambling. I'm just typing as it comes to me :) So, are you waiting? What for? Who with? Is it worth the wait? I can't wait for the day when Paul comes home to stay. I bet God feels that way about us too. He can't wait for the day when we come home to stay.

Faith

Faith: (fayth)

NOUN 

1. belief or trust: belief in, devotion to, or trust in somebody or something, especially without logical proof 2. religion or religious group: a system of religious belief, or the group of people who adhere to it 3. trust in God: belief in and devotion to God 4. set of beliefs: a strongly held set of beliefs or principles 5. loyalty: allegiance or loyalty to somebody or something

[ 13th century. Via Old French feid < Latin fides "trust, belief" ]

How do you define faith? Growing up, I lived in a very "insulated" community. Not just the town where I lived, but the schools I attended.  Everyone I knew, I KNEW what they believed, what their "Faith" was (according to 2. of the dictionary definition). And, for the most part everyone knew what my "Faith" was.  It was comfortable. It was easy. Witnessing my Faith (3) to others was something I never really did. Oh, I professed what I believed. And, to some degree, I lived what I believed. When it was convenient. College was my first real experience with people who didn't believe the same way I did. Don't get me wrong - I had friends with different church backgrounds than me before that, but for the most part, they all had some sort of church background, a faith. So, college was a turning point. Did the new friends I made see what I believed in how I lived, what I did and said? I am ashamed now to say, probably not. I did not express my faith openly. A very few, who also had some sort of religious background knew, but only a few.

Paul and I met during these years. I believe we were both living "faithlessly" at that time. But God had bigger plans for us. One of the things that was an unexpected surprise; and, I think kept us dating, was the fact that we did come from the same background. Different lives, but the same "insulation". But we weren't living our faith when we started out. Our road together has taken many paths over the years, and many of them haven't been pleasant. Our faith has taken quite a beating during our journey - in EVERY definition of the word. But, here we are. God hasn't lost HIS faith in us. That is amazing to me! If we can and will accept it, His love is free! Our SALVATION is only conditional on our true repentance of our sins and acceptance of His sacrifice. He has taken all those "faithless" years and erased them. I hope you can rest in this knowledge too. I'm done hiding my faith. God has been good to us!  We are learning to live our faith like we should have been all along.

Faith shouldn't just be a "word of the day". It needs to be a "word of LIFE".